


Space Laser Puppy

by ruff_ethereal



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura and Pidge get a space puppy, Established Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-15
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2018-10-05 19:53:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10315760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruff_ethereal/pseuds/ruff_ethereal
Summary: Allura and Pidge get a space puppy--or as Coran likes to call it, a "slavering hellbeast from the abyss."





	

**Author's Note:**

> For Anonymous. Feel free to send requests.

“You brought home a _puppy..._?” Coran asked.

“Puppy” wasn't exactly the term Coran he use to describe the extra-terrestrial being Pidge had successfully convinced the others to let on board. He would have much preferred “slavering hell beast from the abyss,” but it seemed everyone else was referring to it as a “puppy” so that's what he was going to have to call it.

“Yes, yes we did, and her name is Zwei,” Allura replied.

Coran's eyes widened. _“Quiznak!_ It's a _female?!”_

“Relax, Coran; to Pidge's best knowledge, they are only able to reproduce sexually. We can even figure out how to neuter her, if it'll help allay your fears.”

Coran huffed. “That is _not_ my most immediate concern, though the idea of more of these 'dogs' running around the ship, and a mother with territorial and protective instincts over her pups is certainly _terrifying_!

“How big is this creature going to get? Where are we going to keep it? What are we going to feed it?”

His eyes widened. “Oh no, who's going to clean it up when it--”

Allura held her hand up, Coran stopped. “No larger than six feet and 300 pounds, at the most; Hunk and Pidge have already created a suitable habitat for it in the latter's room; they have also discovered it can eat and survive on most anything; and Pidge has already created drones to do that, until she is properly trained.

“ _Honestly,_ Coran, just because the decision was made on impulse doesn't mean we didn't slow down long enough to work out all the details—Pidge did an _excellen_ t job at that, I assure you.”

Coran frowned. “So was it her idea to bring this… _puppy_ with us, then? Give you a gigantic, lifetime responsibility for a present? I swear, some of these romantic customs humans are so fond of baffle me!”

“No, and it was actually _my_ idea.” Allura blushed, and looked away. “… I told Pidge I would very much _love_ to have her, and promised her certain… _benefits_ … if she would help me convince the others to bring her aboard.”

Coran stared at her. “Your majesty, _please_ pardon my questioning of your decisions, but _what do you even see in that_ … puppy?!”

“Haven't you seen her?!” Allura squealed as she balled her fists in front of her chest. “She's so _adorable!”_

Coran remembered the slavering hell beast from the abyss that had stepped out of the Green Lion alongside Pidge, and found that he really couldn't call her “cute” by any stretch of the word.

“Want to go visit her? I think it will do you well to see just how harmless she is.”

Coran sighed. “Oh, alright. Where is… she right now, anyway?”

“In the training room, being walked,” Allura replied. “You're worrying over nothing, Coran: how dangerous can a juvenile be?”

* * *

_Pew! Pew! Pew!_

The Alteans stood in the observation deck of the training room, watching in a mix of amusement (Allura) and abject horror (Coran) as Zwei blasted holes in the gladiator bots who were desperately trying to get close enough to attack her.

The two-headed quadruped gleefully pranced away from them, four tongues lolling out of her glowing mouths as she zoomed past half the training room in a few seconds. She spun around, skidding on the floor for a moment, before she shut her mouths, blue energy glowing from the gaps between her teeth.

She turned her heads to the gladiator bots, and opened them.

_Pew! Pew! Pew!_

A new round of lasers shot out of her mouth, nailing the bots with lethal accuracy despite the distance, heads exploding, or androids looking in surprise at the brand new holes in their chests, before they dropped dead.

Well to the side of the carnage and hidden behind a barrier, with spare parts and salvaged tech strewn all around them, Hunk and Pidge cheered.

“Woo!” Hunk cried. “Go Zwei!”

“ _Good girl!”_ Pidge shouted.

Zwei turned her heads to them, panting happily. Then, she reared her back and howled with delight, twin beams shooting out of her mouth and searing the ceiling.

“ **Woah!”** Hunk cried as he fell back.

“ _Bad girl! Bad girl!_ **S** **top!”** Pidge cried as she ran out of the field and to Zwei.

Zwei stopped firing, then looked at Pidge in a mixture of curiosity and worry; Coran supposed having two separate faces for each expression helped.

Pidge held out her hand. “Sit!”

Zwei sat.

“Eyes on me,” Pidge said, pointing two fingers at her, before pointing one back at herself.

Zwei looked at her.

Hunk sent a new gladiator bot out.

“See that bot?” Pidge asked, pointing at it.

Zwei's heads nodded.

“Shoot it.”

_Pew!_

The bot's head exploded, and its body fell down soon after.

“ _Good girl!”_ Pidge said, pulling a solidified cube of green goop out of her pocket and tossing it to Zwei.

One of her tongues snatched it out of the air, and threw it into her waiting mouth.

“See the ceiling?” Pidge pointed upwards, at the new burns in the training room.

Zwei turned her heads up.

“Don't shoot.”

Zwei kept her mouths closed.

“ _Good girl!”_ Pidge gave her another treat, and patted her on of her heads, too.

Zwei panted happily, energy still radiating from her lips.

Coran was finally able to wrench his eyes from the scene below him, and to Allura. “Why did _no one_ tell me she could shoot _lasers…?”_

Allura shrugged. “This is just as new to me as it is to you!”

Coran frantically put one of the observation deck's headsets on. _“PALADINS!”_ he yelled. “WHY DID _NO ONE_ TELL ME YOUR NEW DOG COULD SHOOT _LASERS!?”_

Hunk, Pidge, and Zwei winced, their helmets taking a second too long to lower Coran's voice.

“We didn't know until she was on-board, either!” Pidge replied.

Allura put on her own headset. “How did this happen?” she asked.

“We were trying to build new toys for Zwei here out of some spare parts!” Hunk explained. “We made her a robot-version of one of those critters that were running around her planet for her to chase, but it turns out it's part of her species' natural diet, so she ate it after she caught it.

“Like, in just two bites, including the battery.”

“I guess there's something in her species' digestive system and genetic make-up that allows them to adapt helpful traits from whatever they eat,” Pidge added. “It explains why the armoured parts of her looked so much like the rocks on her planet, at least!”

“Well what _else_ happens if she eats more tech?!” Coran yelled.

“We don't know!” Pidge said. “We're actually about to start experimenting to find out.”

“Oh, _wait for me_!” Allura said before before she took off her headset.

Coran reached out and stopped her. “Your majesty! I _beg_ you, _please_ , _reconsider!_ It's _dangerous_ down there with… Zwei in it!”

The two stopped as they noticed movement coming from the piles of scrap and spare tech near Hunk. Allura's mice triumphantly broke through the surface with a new gadget, a broken down a shockwave mining tool—or as it more commonly called, a “Dirt Blaster.”

Allura turned back to Coran and smiled. “The mice seem to think it's safe enough for them to be there, what does that say about me?”

Coran sighed. “Please suit up, your majesty, if for nothing else than my sanity...”

Allura patted him on the shoulder. “I will, Coran, I will.”

As she went to do that, Pidge and Hunk fed Zwei the dirt blaster and quickly got back behind the barrier. They waited a minute for her digestive system to do its work, the glow in her mouths quickly disappearing.

“Do you feel any different, girl?” Pidge asked.

“ _ **WOOF!”**_

She and Hunk staggered back as a cone of sound blasted the barrier, the plates shimmering as it struggled to absorb and disperse the energy.

“Well...” Pidge said as she slowly stepped forward, “I guess that answers that question. Wonder how powerful it is?”

Hunk dug out a non-functioning camera drone, basically a round metal ball without a scope. “Let's find out!” he said, tossing it up and down in his hand.

Zwei began to pant in excitement.

Pidge turned her around to her side, Hunk threw the ball in front of her.

“Bark, girl!”

“ _ **WOOF!”**_

The ball rocketed off, before it quickly lost momentum and bounced harmlessly on the floor.

Pidge hummed as she made notes. “Incredibly powerful sonic blasts, but force disperses widely and quickly, making it ineffective at long range. Hunk, could you get that ball back?”

“Already on it!” Hunk said as he ran off to fetch the ball. He came back, threw it back to Pidge when he close enough.

Zwei intercepted it. _**“WOOF!”**_

The ball came rocketing back to Hunk.

Hunk yelped and raised up his shield.

The ball ricocheted off the barrier, and back to Zwei.

Pidge watched with interest as she intercepted it again, angling her heads towards Hunk.

“ _ **WOOF!”**_

Now that he knew it was coming, Hunk angled his shield to send the ball ricocheting to Zwei. “Heh! It's like we're playing catch!” he said after it bounced off. “Sonic-Bark Catch!”

“ _ **WOOF!”**_

Hunk smiled and angled his shield away from Zwei, to give her some challenge this time.

At the same time, Allura entered the training room.

Zwei turned her heads to her, and began to pant in excitement. As the forgotten ball bounced and rolled on the floor, she ran towards Allura, tongues hanging out of her mouth, her expression excited as could be.

Allura smiled at her as she held out her arms in greeting. _“_ _Hello again, Zwei~!”_

Pidge's eyes widened. “Wait, Allura, Zwei--!”

Too late.

Zwei barked.

“ ** _WOOF!”_**

Allura's smile disappeared.

_Thoom._

Allura braced herself just before went flying, skidding across the floor for several seconds until she finally came to a stop.

“ _Your highness!” “Princess!” “Allura!”_

Zwei yelped and sat down mid-stride, paws skidding on the ground until she stopped. She whimpered and looked at Allura in worry as Pidge and Hunk rushed over to help her back up.

“ _I'm fine!_ I'm fine!” Allura said as she got back up by herself. “This armour was made to withstand _much_ worse things!”

“You sure you're alright?” Hunk asked as he and Pidge came to her.

“Definitely!” Allura replied. She looked at Zwei, frowning with her heads drooping. “If anyone needs comforting and care, it's Zwei...”

She smiled as she began to slowly walk to her.

Zwei whined and began to step back.

“It's okay!” she called out. “I'm fine and I'm _not_ mad, Zwei! I know you didn't mean to hurt me.”

Zwei stopped, tilted her heads to the side in confusion.

The mice scampered over to Pidge, dug into her pockets and delivered several treat cubes to Allura. She thanked them, then held them out for Zwei.

“Here: as proof that I'm not mad.”

Zwei carefully padded over, her six pairs of eyes looking up at her for permission.

“Go on!” Allura chirped. “Take them.”

Zwei began to slowly, carefully pick up the cubes, opening her jaws out only as much as her it would take for tongues to slither out and pick up the cubes.

“I know it was just an accident, Zwei,” Allura hummed as she petted one of her heads with her free hand. “You're still a puppy with _plenty_ to learn, mistakes are going to happen.”

Zwei swallowed the last cube, and started panting happily.

“Feeling better now?” Allura asked.

Zwei was about to bark.

Allura braced herself.

Then, Zwei shut her mouths, and began to nod.

All of them relaxed.

Allura let out a sigh of relief. “She learns fast!” she said as Pidge and Hunk came over.

Hunk laughed. “Yeah, she does! Probably gets it from her Dad-Mom Pidge over here,” he said, thumbing to her.

Pidge scowled. “She's my _pet_ , not my kid, Hunk, knock it off! And why am _I_ the dad-mom?”

Allura chuckled. “Well we _are_ taking care of her now, aren't we? And _really,_ Pidge, it's _quite_ obvious that you're the more paternal figure between us two.”

“Building all sorts of cool tech for her with her uncle, teaching her how to shoot _friggin' laser beams_ out of her mouth, religiously recording everything she does—yep, totally the dad-mom in this pair,” Hunk said, nodding.

Pidge sighed, and smiled. “Fine… so, Allura, want to play catch with our 'daughter?'”

Allura chuckled. “I'd love to~”

From the observation deck, Coran watched the trio began to play catch with Zwei, laughing and smiling as she and Allura ran across the training room, seeing who could knock the ball the farthest away and still send it back to the other.

He sighed as he pulled off his headset, and left the observation. He supposed the newest member of the Team Voltron did make Allura happy, and Pidge was more than capable of training her so she wouldn't end up accidentally destroying vast swathes of the ship.

He still wasn't going to clean up after her if she made a mess, though.


End file.
